Life-State - What Is It?

Essentially our lifestate is the moment-to-moment strength we have when dealing with everyday life. One moment we can be up, the next we can be down. For example, let's say we're in a rush to reach somewhere important and hit some traffic - for many of us that means our lifestate becoming one of anger - then we glance across at an Aston Martin joining the lane next to us - envy - the phone rings and it's someone form work informing us a tricky problem has just been solved - relief - steadily the traffic begins to disperse and for a few moments we let ourselves feel almost happy - then the phone rings again - this time it's our partner telling us our child has fallen ill at school and needs picking up - once again, our lifestate is on the move, and so it continues moment by moment.

When - as with the example above - we allow our environment to control our lifestate, we invite all manner of consequences ... We become dictated to by events ... We become attached to outcomes ... We become dependant on externals. In other words, when things are going well we're "happy", or so we believe, but when things are going not so well we're "unhappy". And when things get really tough, what do we do then? Hide ourselves away by doing something we shouldn't? Perhaps we rush out and get drunk, start smoking again, have a fling, change jobs, give someone a piece of our mind, lash out, go on a spending spree, etc. Typically these are reactions, albeit some more spontaneous than others. That's not to say they're inherently wrong per se - that's down to each individual's circumstances - but neither does it say they're right. What it does say is that we're allowing ourselves to suffer when our lifestate is low and we're kidding ourselves that the only way to escape all this is by seeking happiness outside ourselves. In other words, we tell ourselves the best way to beat the bad stuff is to reach out and grab some good stuff. And so the cycle continues ...

What's the solution? To make the determination to strengthen our lifestate and win in every moment no matter what. We achieve this by making fundamental changes to our way of being from the inside out. It's no good changing our environment - that will only lead to greater dependance. Instead, we must make the change from within. Everything we need is there already - all we need do is tap into it and take ownership and responsibility for each moment of our life. Only then can we move forward with true spirit and determination. That's not to say it's easy. Far from it in most cases, but the benefits are exponential. We even begin to embrace challenges as opportunities for growth - that's when we really know we're winning!

There is no short-cut to achieving change as sustainable as this - it builds over time. Yet it begins with the determination to win. I started this very same journey back in 2004 and have created a module specific to helping create this change. It provides genuine insight into how we can cut through the negative habits and patterns in our life to create a far greater existence for ourselves and others. Contact me on simon@rightlifecoaching.co.uk for more information.

INQUIRY: Look back over the last few weeks (and months if you prefer) at all the incidents that have sent you reeling from one emotional state to another - both good and not so good. How did you cope with them? Did you let them dictate to you, or did you claim ownership and win no matter what? What could you have done better?

ACTION: For the next month, beware of when you're allowing your environment to control you. Watch out for when you let the negative side of things get you down, and for when you cling to something positive in the hope it will make you feel better. If you find yourself bouncing from one lifestate to another then make a note of it - this means you're making steps in the right direction. When you're ready, contact simon@rightlifecoaching.co.uk to learn how to build on this and create a lifestate strong enough to withstand all challenges.